Saturday, September 4, 2010

Texas Tidbits : All the News That Isn't Fit to Print, But I'll Print It Anyway

To Protect and Serve...Beer*
Happy Labor Day Weekend, 2010, y'all! Since it is a holiday weekend, and all of you will be in the mood for fun, froth and frivolity, not earth-shattering news about stuff like Mexican Food and Bar B Que or the story of a guy who finds a missile launcher in his garden (!), you want some lighter fare that fits the occasion. Ask and ye shall receive. The torrid typing of the Texas Tidbits Teletype produces these gems (or BS, depending on your point of view) :
  • Midland - The Sheriff's Department of Midland County sounds like a great place to work. The "perks" are really cool...til you get caught. It seems that five of Midland's finest were enjoying a little fellowship and discussing pressing law enforcement issues at an establishment named "Twin Peaks". I don't don't know about you, but as a bachelor and man of the world for most of my adult life (until I met Heather), when a place of business is named "Twin Peaks", two things leap to mind. Mountains or scantily clad young women. Being that this episode took place in Midland, mountains are ruled out immediately. That leaves what's behind door number two : scanitly clad young women. Having said that, the name of a place alone is not necessarily an indication of what kind of business it is. However, and that's a big however, when the business' motto is “fun, friendly and sometimes flirty atmosphere!”, red flags (and scantily clad young women) go up like they were shot out of a thirty-aught-six. The scenario : These five cops were having a couple of beers at Twin Peaks. They befriended one of the scantily clad young women who works there and one of the Men in Blue invited the scantily clad young woman outside for a few snapshots. Nothing good could come from that. Even I have never been so inebriated as to do such a dumabass thing, plenty of other dumbass things but nothing this dumbass. Anyway, as if taking this girl outside for a few pictures isn't dumbass enough, one of the cops gives her an AK-47 AR-15! (thanks to anonymous in the comments for the correction-Toby) to pose with on his squad car! Epic.Fail. The High Sheriff of Midland County failed to see the humor in this little incident and took appropriate disciplinary action against the officers. In all this skullduggery and debauchery (and harmless law enforcement fun), there is a two word moral to the story for the gentlemen involved : Dunkin. Donuts.
There's your heart-warming human interest story for this week. Be sure to tune in next week when we'll have a blockbuster of a tale when the Midland Sheriff's Department spurns the lure of the scantily clad young women at Twin Peaks and opt for buffalo wings, beer and scantily clad young women at Hooters. You don't wanna miss it!

*Photo from


  1. That's not an AK, that's an AR-15

  2. Thanks,Anonymous. The correction will be made.

  3. Holy Guacamole, Toby!
    You need a crash course on firearms.

    Anyway, as bad as those Midland cops screwed up, it can(and has) be a whole lot worse.
    I mean completely FUBAR.

    A new firearm for shooters to get familiar with is the new SOCOM Mk17.

  4. I don't know squat about guns, the paper where I first read the story said "AK-47", so I went with it. thankfully Anon. showed me the error of my ways. :)

  5. "I don't know squat about guns"

    I...I...I just don't know what to say.
    Fired my first shotgun at the age of 6 and knocked that paint can right off of that fence post. Shot service match for the USAF and have helped arm and train dozens over the years.
    Besides my family, happiness is a belt fed weapon.

  6. When I say squat I don't mean nothing, I know a little about firearms,.22,.30.06,shotguns, etc, but I am nowhere near being even a mid-range expert. I have used guns before and I enjoyed it, I just have a lot to learn.

  7. "I just have a lot to learn"

    Oh well, that's different.
    For a moment you had me worried that you were a hoplophobe.

  8. LOL No, I am not a hoplophobe. I would love to own some guns. Best insurance policy out there.

  9. I recommend buying only high quality firearms.
    A basic home defense/survival inventory should include a pump shotgun, handgun(revolver if you aren't prepared to train on an auto) and a carbine. You'll need some accessories and don't forget to have some good edged weapons.

  10. I made a note of that. Thanks. I'd like to get some proper traing with guns from certified instructors and get a concealed carry permit.

  11. For a handgun round I am a strong advocate of the .45ACP for many reasons.
    It is a man stopper, there are many quality semi-autos that are chambered for it and it is a subsonic round. Being subsonic, I have no hesitation in firing it without hearing protection, even in an enclosed space like a home or auto, as it doesn't break the sound barrier and cause the painful high frequency sound waves that create permanent damage to my hearing.
    Boogeymen aren't known to allow you time to put in ear plugs.
    A round is supersonic at 1,000ft per sec, and a typical .45ACP round is under 900ft per sec.
    It matters, I assure you. Even shooting a .22 can cause that painful *crack* when the round exits the barrel traveling faster than 1,000ft per sec.
    I was breaking in a new short barreled .357Mag(beyond supersonic) one day and forgot my ear plugs. So I went ahead and torched off a round in a creek bed. My jaw bones and ears ached for 30 minutes.


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