Friday, September 3, 2010

Maine Minutiae : My Wife Is Beating Me

Where's Mine?
No, ya goofball, not like that. Heather is beating me at my own game - blogging. How in the name of all that is Holy can this be happening? Just minutes ago, as Bailey the Number 2 Daughter walked with me to the mailbox, we were learning all the numbers on the apartment doors, 1-16. So far, so good. I retrieved the mail and we walked back to our place, enjoying a sunny late summer day in Maine. then the roof caved in on me - a devastating blow to my male ego from which I may never recover. I feel like the guy in Indiana Jones who played the part of the human sacrifice. Remember him? He was caged up in some contraption, hoisted above what looked like the crater of an active volcano. Hundreds of people in this big ass cave were chanting in unison something like "ya mama's a white one". Then the head voodoo doctor guy, who was painted up like some truck stop Trixie, goes over to the caged up guy, who's also saying "ya mama's a white one", and rips caged up guy's STILL BEATING HEART RIGHT OUT OF HIS CHEST! I feel like caged up guy. My still beating heart has been ripped from my chest, but I have the added luxury of having mine STOMPED on - by a Yankee Woman no less! Other than that, my day has been lovely. What is causing this almost unbearable trauma? Heather got a notice in the mail today that she is getting a check from Google for the money she made on her blog! OUCH! That's gonna leave a mark. Why haven't I gotten a payment from Google? It's not fair! I am gonna hold my breath until I turn blue! (Insert large inhaling sound)
On the real side : I am very proud of Heather for her accomplishment. She's put a lot of time and effort into her blog and the results speak for themselves. Writing the blog is the easy part. She puts countless hours into cooking the meals she writes about. On top of that, there's the planning, the prepping of the stuff to make a certain meal, the cleaning up afterwards (although I try to help her out as much as possible), etc. Add to that the exercising she does to maintain her new healthy lifestyle, and she's one busy woman. Hell, the steadfast dedication she has shown in sticking to such a demanding lifestyle, in and of itself, is nothing short of amazing - like her. If that's not enough, she also has the toughest job in the world - being a mother to our two kids. Heather also has the second toughest job in the world to deal with - being married to me. That alone is worth a Congressional Medal of Honor. Just ask her. :) I wanted to share this with you because my wife is an inspiration, not only to me and the girls, but to everyone who wants to make a change in their lives, any kind of change. You folks can look to Heather as a role model, if for no other reasons than her rock-solid commitment to her goals and the single minded determination she shows in achieving them. I love you, Heather. I am proud and honored to be your husband. You are one hell of a woman.

Texas Tidbits : Hungry in Maine for Texas Vittles

Numero Uno BBQ
Yesterday's post on Texas Tidbits left me a bit nostalgic for The Lone Star State. I figured that since moving back to Texas ain't gonna happen anytime soon, I got to thinking about a solution to this dilemma. I found one. If I can't go to Texas, I'll bring part of Texas to Maine! Off the top of my head, I came up with a short list of things back home that I'd like to bring to The Pine Tree State.
  • Mexican Food made by real Mexicans - I have eaten Mexican food all over the country. None of it is as good as Tex-Mex. End of story. There are many Mexican eateries around the USA that have great food, but none compare, according to my taste buds, to La Cocina Mexicana in Tyler. Probably the best Mexican food I have ever eaten. La Cocina, Spanish for kitchen, has the usual array of menu items you'll find at most Mexican Restarants. But even their "ordinary" stuff is better than most others' best stuff. For instance, beef tacos made with steak instead of hamburger. Slap me down and call me shorty, those tacos are flat good. One item on the menu at La Cocina Mexicana that stands out, even amongst all the authentic and outstanding cuisine, is the cactus tacos. Si, cactus tacos. With fresh cantaloupe juice for your drink. If you are a fence-sitter on the subject of God, one dose of these cactus tacos and all doubt will be forever removed from your mind. These things are inspired by the Almighty His Own Self. I almost forgot! When you first enter the place there is a pastry case with fresh homemade Mexican desserts, pan dulce (sweet bread), and other pastries that are mama-slappin' good. Even if you are just passing by La Cocina Mexicana, stop by just to open the front door and get a whiff olfactory awesomness. La Cocina Mexicana is located on Gentry Parkway in the barrio in northeast (?) Tyler, just north of downtown. Friendly advice : go hungry, very hungry.
  • Bar B Que - Not much for Bar B Que up here. I 'd import any roadside BBQ stand in Texas to Maine. I have eaten at this sort of BBQ stand all over Texas and they never disappoint me. Even the bad stuff is good. The one BBQ restaurant in Texas that I'd relocate to Maine is Sammie's Bar B Que in Fort Worth. This place is/was (I don't know if they are still open for business). Sammie's had been in business for many years when I was a kid and if they are still open, I wouldn't be one bit surprised. This joint reeked of Texas Bar B Que. A section of picnic tables lined up side by side, some regular restaurant tables, sawdust on the floor, baskets of peanuts on every table, a jukebox, beer, a Budweiser clock with a waterfall and the Clydesdales in it (!) and of course there's the food. Brisket so sweet and tender, ribs cooked to perfection, red beans, cole slaw, onion rings, french fries the size of small baseball bats...hungry yet? UPDATE! : Sammie's is still open! I found their website also! Get a drool napkin and click here to slobber like a teething baby. You're welcome.
This is one of those posts that I could easily turn into a novel, so I'll pick up on this subject another time. Anyway, La Cocina Mexicana and Sammie's Bar B Que, a little taste of Texas that I can taste just thinkin' about it. And believe me, I am thinkin' about it real hard right now. Somebody please pass the rib plate!

Copyright ©

All Original Material © Toby Shoemaker