Texas Tidbits: Central Texas and Glass Bottom Boats

Glass Bottom Boat for Shark-hunting and Spongebob Spotting

I don't know how I could have been writing on this blog for five months now, (five months?...wow!) and not mention once one of my fondest child hood memories. It involved traveling south on I-35 to Austin, San Antonio and San Marcos. I can't recall what we did in Austin, but I think we went to the Capitol Building, which was real cool for a kid my age. I was maybe 6 or 7 at the time. In San Antonio, we of course, went to the Alamo. I still remember being that most sacred of Texas monuments and replaying the Battle of the Alamo, probably recalled from the John Wayne movie about the battle. In my little boy mind, I was Davy Crockett, fighting off the attacking Mexican soldiers with Old Betsy, my trusted long rifle. Bang! I shot one of the bad guys. Smack! A rifle butt to the chops! Davy (me) saves the day! Then reality sets in when my Dad calls me over to look at another exhibit in the mission. From the Alamo went up to San Marcos to visit something called "Aquarena Springs". I wasn't very enthused by having leave the Alamo before Davy Crockett (me) could save the day, but this was my fate. Aquarena Springs it was. I quickly changed my mind when I discovered that the boat we were getting ready to board, had a glass bottom! From Davy Crockett, I was now a miniature Jacque Cousteau, exploring the crystal clear waters of the San Marcos River. Through that galass bottom I could see all manner of fish, soft shell turtles, giant squid and man-eating sharks! I made up the part about sharks and giant squid, but a kid can pretend, can't he? That glass bottom boat was one of the best things I have ever seen in my life! I almost forgot about the diving pig! They put a pig on a diving platform way up in the air and a pig actually dived off of it! Way frakkin' cool. Here it is, almost fifty years later, and I remember that boat ride like it was yesterday, giant squid, sharks and all.  :) My family and I are tryin' like hell to get a trip to Texas to fit into our summer plans next year. Maybe my two little girls will see the magic in that glass bottom boat that I saw on that summer day so long ago. I get this sneaky feeling that Bailey the 3 year old will say something like, "Daddy, I just saw SpongeBob!" And that will probably be her memory of the glass bottom boat fifty years from now. I know I'll believe it. After all, I saw that giant squid and those man-eating sharks.

Maine Minutiae: A Story With a Valuable Lesson

Bob***

This is the time of year where the weather is obviously cooler and outdoor activities like hiking become a welcome treat after a long, hot summer in states like Texas, Louisiana, Arizona, etc. Here in New England winter hasn't arrived yet and taking a hike into the woods is a great idea. Exploring in the woods, desert or mountains are a favorite past time of many, but they can become a tragedy for a few. Before setting out to enjoy the gifts God has given us, please remember two words: BE PREPARED!

I am bringing this up today for a very good reason. My good friend Bob at Texas Tweeties was almost one the tragedies of exploring. He and his better half, Ann, nearly became victims of their own passions - hiking and bird watching. I realize it sounds a bit odd that birding can end in tragedy, but it almost did for Bob and Ann, who are both in their 70's.

Here's the story in Bob's own words. Click the link, then come on back and I'll have another word or two about what happened.

I know that when the snow does fall here in Maine, many of you will go hiking or cross country skiing. You may have done either of those a hundred times and not had a problem the scope of Bob's. Please don't be over confident to the point of carelessness. Take all necessary precautions when you set off on your jaunt through the woods. It could save your life!

I am not writing this post to make fun of or ridicule Bob, quite the contrary. I would be heartbroken if something were to happen to him or his bride. I write this as a friendly reminder to all of us (me included) to take an extra few minute to be certain that we are prepared for any contingency. This website gives you some information for assembling a survival kit when you set off into the wild. In addition to that site, here's a "bing" search with a great deal of information on how to be ready for a possible emergency situation.

I hope that you'll find this article useful as a guide to make sure you are better-prepared for you outdoors activities.

Personal to Bob: I'm glad you and Ann are OK. I have a trip to Texas in store and you owe me a margarita or seven.  :)

***photo from hikingworld parks.com***

Texas Tidbits: What's That Name Again?

Kermit or Kermeet?

Howdy, y'all! I found the subject for today's Texas Tidbits like I find many of the posts for this blog - just goofin' around on the internet. But this post is unique. It's more about audio than the written word. let me 'splain.
I am a Native Texan and I have traveled to thousands of nooks and crannies all over the state. I have seen some of the weirdest names of towns you can imagine - Cut and Shoot, Gun Barrel City and Uncertain to name a few. I have also been to places where the name is pronounced completely different than the way it is spelled. Simple names like Colorado City. Easy, right? Not so fast there, diction breath. The correct (at least to the locals) way to pronounce Colorado City is Colla-ray-da City. Weird, huh? What about some other towns in Texas that present a similar dilemma? Mexia? Miami? Gruene? I am not going to give you those pronunciations. I ain't gonna leave you hangin' either.

This is where my Accidental Internet Discovery of the Day comes in. I found a site called Texas Tripper that has a bunch helpful information about Texas. It also has a pronunciation guide to help even the most seasoned Texan avoid those spoken faux pas. Click on the link and scroll down till you see the alphabet written in red letters. Click on a letter and a list of Texas towns whose name begins with that letter will be displayed. Then just hit the "play" button on the media player and a man's voice will give you the correct way to pronounce that city's name. I think it's pretty cool and as smart as I thought I was, I ain't. Give it a go and see how well you do and let me know in the comment section.

Good luck and I'll see you in Palacios !

Second Chance Sunday: Two Great Men and a Historic Document

I am gonna be busy most of the day tuning up the new blog, Because Toby Said So, so today on Three States Plus One I am using the Not-So-Wayback Time Machine to locate some of the most - read posts from the past few weeks. It's a great time to take a second look at something you enjoyed reading before for some of you. For those who are newer readers or those who missed them the first go round, prepare to be amazed at the bullshit brilliance you are about to witness.

• I am ashamed of myself, but I had totally forgotten about this post. It's about a true American hero named Captain Dan Luckett. Dan was severely injured when an IED blew up under the Humvee he was in. If you do nothing else today, please take a few minutes to read a story of courage, bravery and the will to survive. It'll make you feel good about being an American and proud of young men and women who serve in our country's Armed Forces.
• We The People - Need I say more?
• We are in Week 10 of the NFL Season and I thought it appropriate to remind each of us, that there are far more important things than football. This man was more than a Coach.

Enjoy the games and be thankful to the Almighty that Brent Musburger ain't doing play by play. Drop in here during halftime and look through the archives for plenty of good stuff. Today is also a good day to make story suggestions or drop a comment in the comment section. I'd be thrilled to hear from you. Until next time, adios!

A Carefree Dumbass Saturday

Typical Dumbass***

It's a beautiful autumn Saturday here in New England and the whole family is busy doing what we do on such a magnificent day. Heather is in the kitchen making gingerbread (which neither of the kids have had before), the girls are outside making a large pile of leaves suffice as a mattress and I am at my laptop looking out the back windows watching the blue jays, dove, cardinals and chickadees battle for a corner booth at the bird feeder. It hasn't snowed here yet, which is a little surprising to me. But soon enough I'll be telling you about the Nor'easter that blew through and dumped a couple of feet of snow on us. this will be Bailey the Three Year Old's first winter where she'll actually know what snow is all about. That should be a hoot.

Here's a bit of news for you: I am putting together another blog! On it, I'll be writing about whatever crosses my mind, probably about life and the way I see it. No matter the subject, you'll continue to get the type of crap insightful and brilliant commentary that makes you sick to your stomach   you've come to loathe expect from me. On the new blog, I highly encourage you to participate in the comment section. I know you have a lot to say, and all points of view no matter how stupid are welcome. I am still in the design phase of the new place and I hope to have it up and running by Monday. Stay tuned.

I think for this weekend I'll feature some dumbass stories to keep you bored to hell entertained.

• Let's start with this one about a guy named Leon who ran afoul of the law in Waco, Texas. Let me tell you this. A guy named Leon gettin' busted in Waco will not end up good for Leon. Just sayin'.
• I don't know about you, but when I hear of a story that involves a a crook and a riding lawnmower, I can almost feel the hilarity that will ensue.
• This is one of the first stories I posted on my other blog Dumbass News. It features the Wide World of Dumbass Sports and how they can improve your marriage. Hey, I aim to please. 

That lineup of dumbasses ought to keep you nauseous busy for a while. Enjoy them and rejoice in the fact that no matter what you do in life, there's always a bigger dumbass than you. 

***mugshot from The Smoking Gun***

Maine Minutiae: North Pole or Bust!

One of the most celebrated explorers of the 20th Century was Admiral Robert Peary, a resident of Fryeburg, Maine, near Portland. On April 6, 1909, Peary claimed to be the first man to reach the geographic North Pole. This amazing accomplishment had its detractors at the time, and is widely doubted even today. No matter the claim as accurate or not, a feat of this magnitude is simply amazing just considering the "technology" of the day. I realize that a dog sled is a dog sled is a dog sled, but modern technology in just the clothing alone as compared to the clothing worn by Admiral Peary in 1909 and before, is like comparing the Wright Brothers' flight to the space shuttle. I don't know how many of you have spent any time at altitude, but it can be damn cold. I have experienced, live and in living color, 32 degrees BELOW ZERO, with 40 mph winds. What Admiral Peary and his crew experienced at or near the North Pole in 1909 is something that escapes me. Those SOB's were COLD. The navigation equipment in the early 20th Century was a compass and the North Star. Today, GPS devices can pinpoint your exact location to within a foot or so anywhere in the world (!), thanks to satellites orbiting the Earth.

I am not writing this post to debate whether or not, Admiral Peary reached the exact location of the geographic North Pole, but to show that what the man and his crew accomplished is nonetheless historic. They made it to the Top of the World with the hand that was dealt them. The Admiral and his comrades exemplify the Spirit of Maine and of America - the innate urge deep inside the human soul that somehow spurs us to seek and understand the unknown. I believe that urge to explore and discover is something that bring us closer to God. He created this world for the benefit of Man and left it to us to endeavor to understand it so we can understand Him. Otherwise, I think, we would lead a lonely existence on this big blue marble and we would have an empty place in our souls. And God would be irrelevant to us. But He had a much better plan than that, and He gifted us a magical place. A place where our discovery and exploration of such wonders as the North Pole, would give us pause to think and marvel at what we see around us. When we observe the seemingly ordinary things in the world, I think we should look at them through the eyes of a child - with wonder and amazement at how things "work". How does something as innocuous as an acorn create something as majestic as an oak tree? Or how does a seed smaller than the eraser on a pencil evolve into the magnificence that is a tomato.

 I think that is how men like Admiral Peary see the world. For example, the North Pole doesn't represent the top of the world, it represents something much more than that. It's a challenge waiting to be met. An obstacle waiting to be overcome. An army of sorts waiting to be conquered. Simply put, the adventurer that is part of the character of men like the Admiral, seek the most arduous task to complete because...it's there.

Texas Tidbits: A P B & J Experience

Grape Jelly and Smooth Peanut Butter

I was goofing around looking for a subject to post about this morning and actually came across a few neat things quite by accident, so I figured what the heck, go ahead and do a story about one of them?

Small towns in East Texas always have the best local festivals anywhere. We have previously talked about the East Texas Yamboree in Gilmer and today we'll check out another local festival in rural Texas.

• Our stop will be a place I visited a thousand times as a kid - Grand Saline. And, yes, the "saline" part of the name means salt. There's a huge salt deposit in the area and it is currently being mined by Morton Salt. This year the inaugural  The Great American Peanut Butter Festival will be held in Grand Saline and the featured attraction will be a peanut butter and jelly sandwich being put together by area residents. This is no ordinary pb and j, however. By the time all is said and done, this sandwich will weigh more than 950 pounds! A new World Record! From the festival's website we get a little inside information on what it takes to build a 950 pound pb and j, "We expect the process to take most of the day", says sandwich builder Keith Parsons. "We'll have to wait for the dough to rise, bake the bread in a large oven and then finally we'll spread the peanut butter and jelly onto the bread with long boat oars". And what would a Peanut Butter Festival be without naming a Peanut Butter Queen? Fear not! A Peanut Butter Queen will be named! I just wander if they'll name a Jelly Queen, too?

Community events such as the Great American Peanut Butter Festival make me realize how much I miss living in East Texas. This festivals may seem to be a little silly to some folks, but not to me. I participated in literally thousands of local events like the PB & J Festival when I was a Radio Guy and I always took something home with me after being a part of the festivities. Things that stick out in my mind are: 1)  How much time and effort goes into putting together an event such as this one. Countless hours are put in by people volunteering their time to do something beneficial to the community. Then there's the sigh of relief when the whole thing is over with. Once the festival is over, these same people immediately start thinking about how to make it better for next year. Now, that's dedication. 2) The sounds of children echoing throughout the town square. You can't beat that. 3) The write up in the local newspaper. Whoever reviews these hometown events has the best job in the world for a few days. First, there's the big build up to the event itself. Then the event. And finally the recap of the happenings themselves. The pride and excitement of the event are chronicled with such excitement and pride, you'd think the local baseball team just won the World Series. 4) The aftermath. The local citizenry huddle in groups at the local diner for breakfast and/or coffee on the Monday after the festival to relive their favorite memories and to brag how their child/grand child won the pb & j sandwich eating contest in his/her age group. A good time was had by all.

I think I'll salute the Great American Peanut Butter Festival by slappin' together a pb &j and sharing it with Bailey the three year old. A good time will be had by both.  :)
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