Say It Again Sunday!

Fall has finally arrived in New England, so much so, it actually feels like football weather. It's 12:39PM as I type this post and the current temperature is 52 degrees. It's a perfect day to post a Say It Again Sunday! I went through the Three States Plus One trash can archives and found three posts that were laughed at mercilessly by inmates at the State Prison  well-received by you, the reader. Keep the Alka Seltzer close by, just in case, and read on.

• Texas Tidbits : All the News That's Unfit For Print...
• Maine Minutiae : House for Sale... 
• Colorado Chronicles : Honey, Can We Move Here? 

If you enjoy knowing that some other poor schmuck is a bigger schmuck than you, click on over to my other blog Dumbass News. No matter how much your day has sucked, there's always a bigger dumbass than you, and Dumbass News is guaranteed to prove it to you.

Enjoy the last Sunday of September and we'll see you later! Adios, y'all!

Toby

Plus One: Norcross, Georgia - Home of Capt. Dan Luckett, American Hero

Hero

I was just cruisin' the net a few minutes ago, when I came across the story you are about to read, on Facebook. It was posted by a good friend of mine, Marcy. I thanked her on Facebook and I'll thank her here again for bringing the story to my attention. It's the story of a young man whose courage and determination in the face of seemingly insurmountable odds, are a testament to the character of an individual of whom all Americans can be proud. His name is Captain Dan Luckett, a Son of Norcross, Georgia who has served his country far beyond the call of duty. I"ll post the first few lines of the article. Please take a moment to click the link and read it. It's well worth the time.

(Associated Press) When a bomb exploded under Dan Luckett's Army Humvee in Iraq two years ago — blowing off one of his legs and part of his foot — the first thing he thought was: "That's it. You're done. No more Army for you."
But two years later, the 27-year-old Norcross, Georgia, native is back on duty — a double-amputee fighting on the front lines of America's Afghan surge in one of the most dangerous parts of this volatile country.

I am more convinced than ever that the future of the United States is in very capable hands with young men like Captain Luckett leading the way.

Last Weekend of September "Best of..."

Talkin' With God

Did the month of September zoom by or what? They say as you get older, time seems to move faster. I guess that's true, because this month went by like time lapse photography. Personally, I celebrated the birthday of my favorite uncle, Tony, who died way too young at 58. My 54th birthday came and went and I still don't look a day over 75 and I mourned the loss of a dear, sweet friend to that hideous disease of Satan, cancer - and we've still got five days of September to go! I can think of at least three more family birthdays to come.
Here at Three States Plus One, we are gaining hundreds of new readers from all over the world each week. As I type this post, TSPO has been read by people in 41 of the 50 United States and 26 countries around the globe, with the latest being The Netherlands, New Zealand and Spain. I can't thank you all enough for taking the time to visit our humble abode. Thanks to you, this blog has shot up the Alexa Rankings from 20-something million back in June to 1,411,552 in the world as of a few minutes ago. In the US we now stand at #106,610. That is nothing short of amazing. And it's your fault! it's because we have the best and most loyal readers a blog could ask for. Thank you.

For our newer readers:  I dug deep into the dark, damp,musty bowels of the Three States Plus One archives and slogged through the muck and mire to dredge up some of the most read posts of the past three months. This is what I got stuck with found for your perusal. In other words, I said "eeny, meeny, miny moe" and these three are what you get. Hey, at least I'm honest! If it tickles your fancy (or tickles some place else, it's all good), you can search through the archives and find some real good stuff. There's a search box on upper right of each page of the blog.

Here are this week's Best of...

• Texas Tidbits : Woodville - Where Fish.Fear.Me.
• Maine Minutiae : Augusta
• Colorado Chronicles : Headless Chickens and Other Fun Stuff

That's what's cookin' in Three States Ville this weekend. As always, you are welcome to express your views or thoughts in the comments or to email me at threestatesplusone AT gmail DOT com. Thanks again, y'all. You're the best! Adios!

Colorado Chronicles ; Major Moves

Number 2 Son

NOTE: I am writing this story with my Son's knowledge and approval.
 See that good lookin' young man in the photo? That's my Number 2 Son, Toby. It's come to my attention that Young Tobe is about to make a major move that could impact his life for many years to come, maybe forever. Here's the deal: A while back Toby met this young lady, Hope (not her real name), when he shared his ChapStick with her. After sharing ChapStick with a pretty young woman, it's traditional to go bonkers over said young lady. They shared, he went bonkers and that brings us to this Major Move I mentioned early in this post. Toby's relationship with Hope has gone way yonder beyond ChapStick sharing. We're talkin' serious business here. Since the ChapStick Share-a-Thon, Hope has moved to Colorado and these two young folks have had a long distance romance. After a while, long distance love is no bueno for caca. So, Toby, ever the romantic fool like his dashing, and equally handsome Father, is packing up and haulin' ass to Denver. I can't say I blame the lad. Toby and I had a discussion of this matter a while back, and I gave him the best Fatherly Advice (patent pending) that I could. Before I go on, Hope moving back to Texas was not an option. I told him that a love like the he has for Hope is a once in a lifetime thing and that, in my mind, he had two choices. Move to Colorado and be with Hope and be sure this is what he wants. If, for some reason, things don't work out like he wants them to, he and she at the very least had given it the old college try. If he didn't go, some day he'd sitting around wondering what if I had gone to Colorado. Personally, I'd rather take a chance and lose than to do nothing and never have a chance. Toby's a level headed young man, so he took what I told him, along with what his friends had to say about the matter and of course listened to what his Mother and older brother (Number1Son) thought about it all. The dude is heading to Colorado in about three weeks.  I've never met nor talked to Hope, but if she's captured my Son's heart, she's gotta be a keeper. I pray that Toby's leap of Faith (see what I did there, Tobe?) will be as rewarding to him as the one I took 4 years ago to come to Maine. Hope, I look forward to meeting you some day soon. Toby, have a safe trip, my Son. Your Old Man is mighty proud of you and I love you.

Goodbye to a Friend

Unconditional Love

I found out a few minutes ago that a close friend of mine and Heather's died last night. She had stage 4 metastasized cancer. She put up a valiant fight, but in the end, that fucking Satan's disease won out, this time. Susan was a kind and caring soul who, despite the odds stacked against her, faced each day with a smile and the determination to kick cancer's ass. Sadly, it was not to be. I'll remember her not only as a great neighbor and friend, but as someone who treated my little girls as if they were her Grand Babies - like the time she stopped at a garage sale and saw this toddler-sized lawn chair and brought it home so she and Bailey could sit out back and "girl talk", despite the fact that Bailey was only 2 years old. Susan used a cane to get around because of her illness, but it did not stop her from playing with my kids whenever she could. She once sat down on the sidewalk with Isabella when Issy was in Kindergarten and they wrote the alphabet on the sidewalk with Issy's sidewalk chalk. I don't know who had more fun, Susan or Isabella! I do know that the last time we saw Sue, she was sure to bring that up. She (Sue) knew that her time on this veil of tears called Earth was nearing an end when she reminded Issy of the sidewalk alphabet, but it was important enough to Susan to remember it at a time when she had so many other things to think about. That was just Susan - a kind, gentle soul who always had a minute (no matter how sick she was) for the kids. Thank you, Sue. It was our honor and privilege to have been your friend and neighbor. God rest you.

With deepest love,
Toby, Heather, Isabella and Bailey

P.S. Monkey is doing fine. He's fat as ever and still hangin' out with the skunks. Silly cat.

Texas Tidbits : An Almost Clean Get Away

Ted?

We've made it to another Humpday and that can mean only one thing! I have no idea what that "one thing" is, but Humpday always means "one thing". Or so I am told. You figure it out and let me know, will ya? I would like to dedicate this post to my friends in Tyler. It sounds just like something one of you would do, especially Ted. Ted is a madman. But he is our madman. I immediately thought of my buddy Ted when I saw this article about a guy practicing his God-given right to break into someone else's home while they are away. An alert neighbor called the heat when he witnessed a man, let's call him "Ted", kick in the front door to his neighbor's house. It couldn't have been the neighbor kicking in his own door while on his weekly tequila-a-thon, the neighbor was having his weekly tequila-a-thon somewhere else and wasn't at home. Besides, it was 3:30AM when this took place so the tequila-a-thon guy would have been passed out by now. Therefore, the alert neighbor knew something was rotten in Denmark. A few minutes later the fuzz arrived, cautiously entered the residence in question, Clint Eastwood cop guns at the ready and quickly spotted the intruder....in the bathtub! I now know that the bad guy isn't my friend Ted because Ted doesn't bathe. But I digress. Let's see, where was I...oh,yeah, the cops enter the house and find the burglar in the bath tub. I've heard of making a clean get away, but gee-moe-netti! The bad guy has to be from Oklahoma or something. Texas burglars are way too smart to get caught because they wanted to take a bath, passed out dead ass drunk maybe, but never to take a damn bath. Needless to say, the suspect was arrested and is now a guest of the Smith County Sheriff's Department, where he gets only one bath per week and is very careful to maintain a tight grip on the soap.

Texas Tidbits : An Almost Clean Get Away

Add caption

We've made it to another Friday and that can mean only one thing! I have no idea what that "one thing" is, but Friday always means "one thing". Or so I am told. You figure it out and let me know, will ya? I would like to dedicate this post to my friends in Tyler. It sounds just like something one of you would do, especially Ted. Ted is a madman. But he is our madman. I immediately thought of my buddy Ted when I saw this article about a guy practicing his God-given right to break into someone else's home while they are away. An alert neighbor called the heat when he witnessed a man, let's call him "Ted", kick in the front door to his neighbor's house. It couldn't have been the neighbor kicking in his own door while on his weekly tequila-a-thon, the neighbor was having his weekly tequila-a-thon somewhere else and wasn't at home. Besides, it was 3:30AM when this took place so the tequila-a-thon guy would have been passed out by now. Therefore, the alert neighbor knew something was rotten in Denmark. A few minutes later the fuzz arrived, cautiously entered the residence in question, Clint Eastwood cop guns at the ready and quickly spotted the intruder....in the bathtub! I now know that the bad guy isn't my friend Ted because Ted doesn't bathe. But I digress. Let's see, where was I...oh,yeah, the cops enter the house and find the burglar in the bath tub. I've heard of making a clean get away, but gee-moe-netti! The bad guy has to be from Oklahoma or something. Texas burglars are way too smart to get caught because they wanted to take a bath, passed out dead ass drunk maybe, but never to take a damn bath. Needless to say, the suspect was arrested and is now a guest of the Smith County Sheriff's Department, where he gets only one bath per week and is very careful to maintain a tight grip on the soap.